Bumebenjonson: Hey Lady
I could have been your lover and you know it,
Mama always said that I’m handsome
And talented, a dream come… (wait for it)
True: your better lover and much better poet.
Too fast for you, so I’ll slow it
Down. Too cold for you? So how come
You’re sweat. If you’re halaman I’m a green thumb
If you’re gulaman, I’m sago. Then you can straw it.
If you say yes, then go; if no, then aray.
I don’t take rejection well; but just for you I’ll try.
Meet Cute
I was in the corner of the café minding my own
Business, when the idiom turned funny on me
And I couldn’t use it anymore. Really, I didn’t mind.
This is me pretending to work but all I want
Is to be someone’s felt tip marker for the day
When suddenly you walk up to me with the line
“Is this seat taken?” Except there is no seat;
This is a standing café.
“Of course it isn’t
Taken. Are you? That last part I didn’t mean
To say out loud.
“No one’s ever asked me that.
Of course I’m not a seat. What are your thoughts
On collateral damage in the war against drugs?”
“What?”
“Some people skip the foreplay
And proceed to the sex, I like skipping the small
Talk and get down to serious…”
“Concerns?”
“What?”
“You can’t say the B-word.”
“No, but may I
Sip the rest of your coffee if you’re not having it?”
“I’m not having coffee.”
“So may I?”
“I didn’t order.”
“Why go to a café if you’re not going to have
Coffee?”
“They don’t serve any here, and in case
You say tea, soda, or even bottled water I am
SMH-ing so hard an owl might think this
A mating call.”
“Owls don’t shake heads, they hoot
Like nobody’s…”
“Agenda?”
“What?”
“You can’t say
The B-word. Are you some sort of owl expert?”
“No, but I saw a clip on YouTube. And now that
I think about it, you were in it. Maybe it is you
Who are the owl specialist.”
“No, I am adopted.
On my eighteenth birthday, my parents told
The truth about my birth: it wasn’t the stork that
Brought me but an owl, which explains my
Crepuscular lifestyle.”
“Which would explain the
Low-lighting here and why you prefer it…”
“I don’t
Prefer it.”
“…but not why they don’t serve any
Drinks at a café. I mean, what is the point?”
“That is the password.”
“What is?”
“The point, yes,
‘whatisthepoint’ is the password, one word lower-
Case no spaces.”
“For the Wi-Fi? I expect that’s
The point of this place and this is supposed to be
Clever. Well it isn’t. Are you the owner?”
“No, as I’ve said
Earlier, I’m…”
“I know, I heard you the first time,
Well, guess what? I’m adopted, too.”
