While I Still Can

Let me, please

I beg of you

Let me catch the whiff of fresh air

Against my cheeks

The first ray of sunshine

As new day breaks

As it kisses the grass

Green on my barefoot  

Before it filters through

The stained glass windows

Bearing memories of a blurry past

Let me step out into the garden

Where I can sniff the scent

Of freshly cut weed

Smell the flowers

Before the petals wilt

And fall to pieces

Like fragments of my heart

Each time you say goodbye

Let me walk the extra mile

Where dogs can trail my path

And cats can linger around my feet

In sheer caress

As if romancing the stone

Grounding

Earthing

Shivering

Let me ride the bus

To the boulevard

Of our broken dreams

Halt somewhat at the marketplace

To pick up my favorite things

Brewed coffee and freshly-baked bread

Along the way

Can I eat at the carinderia?

Like I used to as a child?

With meals cheap enough

Fit for kings and queens

In the middle of fruit

And vegetable spreads

Standing in the way

Of this one vintage passerby

Who has seen it all

Been there

Done that

While children of the poor sleep

Like stray cats and dogs

On the sidewalks

With only the memory

Of last night’s stale bread

In their tender hearts

Let me wander furthermore

To catch another jeepney ride

To savor the blended flavor

Of toxic fumes and cold breeze  

Lashing against my face

As scenes of a past life unfold

By leaps and bounds

Miles and miles away

Traversing hills and mountains

Rugged roads and deep ravines

Framed by wild flowers and wilder confessions

The incredible secrets of youth

The verses of conversations

Sins of omission and commission

Versus lovers and other companions

Promises and compromises

Once again, I fall to pieces

Languishing in remembrances

Of this one life’s peaks and crevices

Let me smile at the stranger

Next to me

Hold the hand of the enemy

Free myself of bondage

For a moment of indiscretion

Passion and compassion

Whisper a prayer to the mighty wind

For forgiveness and a safe journey

To the here and after

Let me breathe

Reflect and genuflect

Pause and ponder

Look back and remember

In thanksgiving manner

The sunset of forever

The green, green grass of home

Let me

Just let me

While I still can.   

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Nestor Cuartero
Nestor Cuartero

Nestor Cuartero finds joy in writing about the commonplace, little, ordinary things and experiences that stand out in memory for their warmth, humor, twist, learnings. A veteran journalist and editor with a Journalism degree from the University of Santo Tomas, husband and father, Media Studies lecturer and farmer, he has won a number of awards in journalism, notably the Grand Prize in Premio de Periodismo by Instituto Cervantes in 2000, and the Binhi Awards’ Environment Journalist of the Year by the Philippine Agricultural Journalists in 2010. Nestor has written three books, 𝐴𝑡 𝐿𝑎𝑟𝑔𝑒, 𝐴𝑡 𝐿𝑒𝑖𝑠𝑢𝑟𝑒; 𝑃𝐻 𝑀𝑜𝑣𝑖𝑒 𝐶𝑜𝑛𝑓𝑖𝑑𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑎𝑙; and 𝐸𝑎𝑠𝑦 𝐿𝑖𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔. He takes pride in being named a Nick Joaquin Literary Awards SALUTE awardee by 𝑃ℎ𝑖𝑙𝑖𝑝𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑒𝑠 𝐺𝑟𝑎𝑝ℎ𝑖𝑐 twice in a row, 2023 and 2024.

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